My New Years' Resolutions

My preliminary resolution is to write down all my resolutions, since I can't remember what my resolutions were last year with the exception of "swear less" and I think I've managed SOME improvement there.

1. Most important resolution is to take better care of myself.  This past semester I've been sick constantly, headaches all over the place, and even now that I've been asleep for a week, I have a nasty ear infection and a lingering sore head.  So I need to find where I put my new glasses prescription so I can get a pair when I go back to Texas...

2. Improve my appearance.  This actually plays into resolution #1, because all of my friends (including my friends in med school) are concerned with how badly my body has been reacting to grad school stress, and have all roundly informed me working on my novels is NOT in fact a proper break from work.  Therefore, spending extra time blow-drying my hair, keeping my nails healthy, and moisturizing my poor, chapped skin is not only going to improve my appearance but also constitute an actual daily mental break from the grind.

3. Go to the damn gym. (See resolutions 1 and 2.)  I actually miss going to the gym like crazy, but last semester was a weed-out semester and I'm still feeling the aftereffects...there was no way I could've managed the gym on top of everything else I was doing.  This semester, I'm going to make time.  Somehow.   

4. Severely reduce bread and rice intake.  I'm going to stop making homemade bread (sigh) and cut back on rice as completely as possible INCLUDING when I eat out.  (Triple sigh.)  I refuse to give up pasta though, because it's in the Geneva Convention on Torture that stopping someone from giving up all three of the Golden Triad of Carbohydrate Deliciousness renders them mentally unstable and not responsible for their actions thereafter.

5. Stop reading the comments.  The comments always suck.  They're always bitter, unkind people who think "trolling" is okay because "it's just the internet".  Since I can't wave a magic wand and make their hateful words stick to themselves in the real world to teach them a lesson about the pervasiveness of hatred and negativity, I will simply stop reading the comments.  After all, all a troll wants is an audience right?

6. Stop swearing.  (This is a long-term process, I'm okay with that.)

7. Try to watch a movie (a new one?) every week.  I have 127 movies on my Netflix queue right now.  You think I'm joking.  In addition to that, I have nearly 40 movies on DVD that I've never watched.  I have to start chipping away at the mountain!

8. Floss more carefully.  Today I went to the dentist and came out with ZERO CAVITIES for the first time in YEARS.  I attribute this to two things: adopting the rather disgusting habit of flossing while I watch late-night tv, and giving up candy almost entirely.  My dentist said I've been doing a good job but there are a couple molars that I need to floss more deeply on (I have a small mouth and big hands) so I'm going to try and focus on those.

9. Write my novels every chance I get.  (And continue to try and get them published.)  I don't know how much time I'll have...but I'll give what I can.

10. Enjoy grad school as much as possible.  Grad school SUCKS, just so you know.  You're tired, overworked, paid just enough so you can ALMOST scrape by with your parents' help, constantly applying for grants and fellowships and gnawing off your fingernails waiting to hear back (or not), you can't even READ papers because all you do is skim them for vital facts and citations before moving on to the next one...trust me, I could go on.  But there are good things.  I love my classmates, and my professors, and I love learning everything I'm learning and the incredible opportunities that can come my way if I just work hard enough to get travel funding for them.  So I'm going to try and cling to the positive bits and push through the negative bits.

What would I give for the entire universe?

When I woke up this morning I was feeling pretty bummed out, so I pulled up my Youtube app and watched Neil deGrasse Tyson's "We Stopped Dreaming" video - which I realize sounds like a strange way of cheering oneself up, as it's all about how society is failing science and technology, but it really makes me feel energized and like I could do something with my life.

Right at the end Neil deGrasse Tyson asks, "How much would you pay for the universe?" and I've never really had an answer, but this morning, I said out loud, "My life."

Not that I think I should sacrifice myself on a public altar; not that I think that sort of action or protest would further the cause.  But I think I should - that a lot of us should - dedicate our lives to the universe.  To science, to technology, to our future.  I already am on that road, let's face it, how many 25 year old girls get to spend their days in a lab with an XRF, analyzing the elemental composition of artifacts from shipwrecks?  I'm guessing it's not a lot.  In fact, I'm guessing the percent total of scientists vs the percent total of hairdressers is not going to be a staggering number either.

Not that I'm hating on hairdressers.  We need them.  We need hairdressers, and construction workers, and auto mechanics and the million and one jobs - people - necessary to keep our world turning.  I think what we also need to do is stop pushing everyone and their brother into college when they don't want or need it.  It's just making higher education ridiculously expensive, it's making huge classes the norm, it's turning colleges into numbers machines instead of havens for learning, experimenting, pushing the envelope.  (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/educationnews/7332452/The-university-professor-who-stood-up-against-dumbing-down-of-degrees.html) Even in my field, it's all about how much you publish, not what you publish. (http://www.theguardian.com/science/2013/dec/06/peter-higgs-boson-academic-system)

We need to stop treating teachers like losers.  We need to publicly destroy the phrase "those who can't do, teach".  We need to start respecting education for what it is (a process) and not for what it can get for us (an endgame).  We need to stop training children out of asking "why" even if it IS annoying when you're trying to cook dinner after a 9 hour workday and two hour commute.  Children are not there to serve our interests; we're here to serve theirs.

And we need to make the universe our priority.  All of it.  After all, we are the most infinitesimal grain of sand on a celestial beach.  With so much out there, why do we keep dismissing it, cutting funding for it, and claiming it's more important to "trickle down" than venture out?

Let's go back to the moon.  Let's go to Mars.  Hell, let's go to Pluto!  (Sorry Dr. Tyson, it will always be a planet to me.)  Let's make "why" and "why not" the two most asked questions in the world. 

Above all...let us have fun doing it.  After all, what is more fun than dreaming great dreams?  Or achieving them?

Final stretch

Well I'm getting closer to Armageddon.  Exam 8 am Wednesday morning (gaaaah I hate getting up at 6 am!!), and I've been trying to study.

Spent the weekend in bed with a sick headache, only getting out of it to lie on the couch and go grocery shopping.

Today I had another bad headache but dragged myself to Big Lots since I was out of toilet paper and kitchen paper.  That cost $10, and I spent $1 on an extra box of tissues and $3 on some rather ugly stove burner covers that will hopefully prevent stuff from falling into my stove and forcing me to clean it up.  The only thing I hate more than scrubbing the inside of a stove-top is scrubbing a floor.  I hate cleaning the bathroom so much it doesn't register on the scale.

It occurred to me today, as I was trying to force the fact that 3-masted carracks appeared in Northern Europe in 1450 AD into my brain, that if I do cave and get cookie-cutters one day in the future, I will ALSO need a rolling pin.  And I really need a sieve before I get either of those things.  Growing up is a real pain in the ass.

I've been trying to plan meals so that everything perishable in my minifridge will be eaten by the time I leave.  I'll fill my tupperwares with water and shove them in there to keep my energy costs down.  Did I mention that growing up is a real pain in the ass?

My dad just learned his whole department might get outsourced to India (I'm not even joking) so he's considering (if it happens) packing up the whole house, moving to the Northwest coast, and renting out our house.  I feel like that would be highly preferable to him selling it (I love that house, and really want to buy it from him one day if I find work that will let me settle in that area), but I hate the idea of my family being so far away.  One of the nicest parts of College Station is that it's only a 15 hour drive from my parents' place, so I could get there in a day if an emergency happened - and New Orleans is the natural stopping point between the two, so I get lovely food whenever I go home or come back to college.

Let's hope his company reconsiders.  I don't think he really wants to live in the Northwest...he loves clear blue skies and warm weather just as much as I do.  Mom is the one who likes chilly air and four seasons.  Still, it's all conjecture right now.  I have enough trouble without borrowing more.  Time to scrabble together some dinner and then back to studying.  Woohooo....

My Crazy Life

Been meaning to update, somehow never get around to it.

When I moved in, I found (to my disgust) I had a minifridge.  I noticed that the deli drawer (simple plastic drawer, not on a track, very easy to remove) had a small crack in it, but I didn't think anything much of it.

One morning a few weeks ago I opened my fridge and found the crack had expanded:

So I emailed the front office and asked what to do, since I didn't fancy using it and finding a gigantic plastic splinter in my hand.

Friday morning (after Thanksgiving) I open my minifridge and realize the drawer (which I had taken out and placed next to my tv) was gone, and a new one was in its place, and all the stuff I'd stacked in the bottom of the fridge were neatly placed in it.  Mildly creepy.  And then, looking closer at it, this one also has a tiny crack in the front.  (Head, meet desk.)

Last night I had some warning signs of a headache so I spent a couple hours cooking to ease the pressure on my brain.  Made a green salad and a chickpea salad (they last a few days in the fridge so I always make extra), and put one of the Cornish game hens I got on sale on Sunday in the oven with a couple potatoes.  My recipe requires basting while cooking, so for the broth I used chicken stock, beer, garlic and chives.  Once done cooking you pour the juices from the hen back into the saucepan and cook it down into gravy...soo good!  I also, since I had a couple pears about to go off, tried "pears n onions" instead of my favorite "apples n onions" which I don't make much any more since apples are so damn expensive here.
  I put in a little apple cider vinegar and some balsamic vinegar to the pears, but it was just too sweet.  Not sure what I should do next time.  I feel like if I find the right ingredient they could be incredible, just not sure what it is yet.

 

My roast hen, resting amid the potatoes that roasted with it.

 

And my dinner!

It was a lovely dinner, but it didn't actually stave off the headache.  It turned into a migraine and I had to take a couple pills and lie down for an hour.  It subsided enough that I biked to campus to draw, and got quite a lot done, but I had to leave around 11:30ish because it was getting much worse.  I decided not to try writing any more that night, so I watched a half-hour of Storage Wars in an attempt to give my brain a break (literally the only times I haven't been working the past few weeks are when I'm in the bathroom, eating, sleeping, or biking) before heading to bed.

I woke up with a migraine still this morning, so I decided to lie there quietly until it eased off, which it did a little after nine, and I got up, went for a walk, and have spent the day pacing my apartment and trying to knock out this essay.  It's a little more than a third done, so I'm hoping I can knock out one third tonight, and one third tomorrow, and turn it in Friday morning and spend Friday on my other essay and the drawing.

Got some headache warning signs right now, so I'm hoping they just go away...decided to not go to campus today to see if staying very still and quiet will ease things.

It would help if I didn't have a ghastly final on Wednesday, and need to work 80 hours before December 19th.  Still.

This is not improving my mood either.  But I have a fur coat now.  It will help me battle hell!  One of my classmates (from Wisconsin) is hoping for snow.  I have informed her that if it DOES snow, I'm sacrificing her to the Weather Gods in hopes of warm weather.

Oh well.  Back to work. 

Isn't it so blurry?

I don't know if my vision is blurring due to overwork, the fact I keep misplacing my glasses, or something is up with my eyes again.  I must remember to make all my winter break appointments (doctor, eye doctor, dentist, car) tomorrow morning. 

And I'm sneezing.  Making hibiscus tea to see if that fixes the sneezing, am highly annoyed I didn't notice in the supermarket that it's caffeine free :(

But I've done a LOT today - got groceries, cooked, cleaned, cleaned out and tidied up my desk, disinfected the last of the stuff from my car and put it back, did my laundry, did my accounts (that took hours ), paid my rent (no late fee this month!), organized my folders, basically did everything except take out the trash and do all the homework I wanted to get done.

Working on homework now, of course, but between the sneezing, and the tired eyes, and the sleepiness...I might wake up on the floor again.  Man, when I think back to all those days in California when I found myself asleep on my desk...or next to it...I think it might be time to take up coffee...too bad I HATE coffee...

Guess I'm glad I got a lot done.  But this week is looming over me and I feel an impending sense of utter doom.

Oh well.  Back to work.  Two weeks from now all I'll have to do is finish  my 80 hour work month in a few days and then I'll have a few days to sleep before it's thesis time!  Woohoo...

Being Stupid

I biked to school in the rain today.  Worst idea ever.  I can feel myself getting sick already.  I shouldn't have stayed there for 4 hours in soaking wet clothes.  Biking home in wet clothes was awful.  I stripped them off, hung them over my shower rod, and turned on my mini heater full blast and sunned myself in the beautiful, beautiful warmth.  I also made the last of my emergency tater tots to give me an internal warmth boost.  Not sure if it worked so much for that, but it did taste nice and ease my immediate misery.

My hands were shaking so badly.  Biking in freezing rain in damp gloves is a terrible idea.  When I go to Florida this Christmas, I'm rooting out my leather gloves, my scarves, my boots and sneakers, and every jacket I own (well...some of them anyway) and bringing them all back here.  I had this airy-fairy idea that since Texas was broiling hot in summer it would merely have chilly winters, particularly since I'm only an hour from the Gulf of Mexico.  HA!  Next time I move somewhere I'm wikipedia-ing their annual climate statistics.

I think all my stuff has drip-dried by now.  I went out and bought thermals and a scarf so hopefully biking to school will be less painful in future.  Considering the respective merits of taking workout clothes (which I already own) to school for in-case-of-soaking-wet-emergency, or buying cheap pants and top at Wal Mart or something and leaving them at school for aforementioned emergency.  Alternatively, could take capris (which I am not wearing due to freezing, inclement weather) and leave them at school with a t-shirt and just buy a cheapo sweater.  Leaning towards the last option.  Maybe I'll get an "ugly Christmas sweater" from Goodwill.  It would be a talking point!

Mom called today to make sure I wasn't dead from the awful Texas weather.  She was cross when I told her about biking in the rain, but relieved that it's not sleeting.  Driving in sleet blows, I remember how much Mom and Dad hated it up north when I was a kid.  I've arbitrarily decided if it sleets I'm not going to class.  I'll wait for it to stop.  I'm pretty sure biking in sleet qualifies as torture under the Geneva Convention.

Anyway.  I have two presentations and a handout due Wednesday, a presentation due the 4th, and a huge paper due the 6th.  I should get back to them.

Oy

Got to campus at 9:20 am, only left at 9:50 pm.  I need to keep working on this paper.  I'm so tired.  Going in early tomorrow to work on my Piscataqua presentation, then work, then drawing as late as I can bear it and then I'll come home and have a nice dinner.

I'm so tired.

The Migraine Diaries

Had an awful day today. 

My lines drawing is STILL wrong, but my prof told me to go ahead and start my construction drawing.  He told me it's ok that it won't be done by tomorrow (the due date) as long as I keep working on it.  Thank goodness!  Otherwise I'd get a failing grade for sure.

Class was rough.  Very interesting...but very tough with a headache and not much sleep.  (Was up late last night working.)

Work was a pain, even though I FINALLY got to start on the XRF.  Took me (and my immediate superior, Chris) nearly an hour to get it up and working.  But hey, troubleshooting is why we practice, right?  Brought in a bunch of my jewelry to analyze it so I can practice with this new software (they didn't have it when I learned XRF back at UF), and found to my horror that my high school class ring which is supposed to be (stamped too) 10K gold was actually copper and zinc with a hint of silver.  Now, I DID order it with protective coating, so this may be the coating (XRF only penetrates so far depending on what the substance is), so it's certainly plausible.  Especially since the way the XRF is built I couldn't really balance the ring any way but on the sides with the engravings.  But considering the $400 price tag circa 2006, there had better be 10k gold on the inside!!!
I also found argon (I'm not even joking) on three of my pieces - two silver pieces that were my mother's that she gave to me when I was a teenager, and then a pair of (modern) earrings she gave me for one Christmas.  I don't work on Wednesdays, but Thursday I'm parking my ass in front of the Bruker computer and fiddling with Artax until I see if there REALLY is argon in there, or if I mistook a different element for it.

I stayed late at work, despite the headache rapidly turning into a migraine, but by 6:30 my eyes were crossing and watering and my head was getting worse and worse so I packed up, warned my classmates I might not be in tomorrow, and headed home.  Biking in the chilly wind was ghastly, not to mention all the bright horrible headlights in the dark night.

I was pretty nauseous and it was tough eating, but I had to do it to take some meds.  Then I went to lie down for an hour to let it pass off, and it mostly has, but I'm still not feeling good.

Pushed through the blah and finished my presentation and worksheet for tomorrow, and am now fighting to find the mental and physical energy to work on another presentation and my scantling list.  I also need to do the dishes, take out the trash, and order more checks.  Being grown up sucks.

The nicest part of today was getting my very first very own insurance card.  Of course, I don't have access to the insurance until December 1st, but still.  Gotta cling to the niceness of the fact I have protection (no matter how minimal) from the hell of illness in the modern healthcare system.

A hug would be nice right about now.

Grad School Problems

I have a huge project due Wednesday.  A lines drawing, a construction drawing, and a scantling list.  The scantling list (not finished) is 36 pages.  I have restarted my lines drawing THREE times and am not finished yet.  I can't begin the construction drawing until the lines drawing is done.

I'm just praying for either an extension, or a kindly lightning bolt to put me out of my misery.

I have a presentation Wednesday too, I finished that already but I'm still working on the handout.

Huge paper due December 6.

Not sure when my last exam is; first week in December I think.

Two big presentations in the first week of December as well.

I'm working 20 hours a week.

And I still need to eat, sleep, shower, keep my apartment reasonably clean and bug-free.

Last opera night of the semester was Friday, had a date last night and one of the professors is having a lunch in half an hour.  I'm calling it my mental health time.  After getting bronchitis 3 times in 2.5 years in Cali I know better than to chain myself to my desk 24/7.  I can't get a PhD if my body has gone to wrack and ruin.

Bureaucratic grunge is stopping me from registering for classes next semester.  I've sent emails about it, but it's ticking me off.  I have more than enough to deal with without shenanigans like that.

I'm so tired.  I felt guilty about sleeping in until 8:30 am yesterday and today.  It's the weekend...other people are going on picnics, or to museums, or just lying on the couch watching football and drinking beer.  I'm running errands, doing homework, juggling household demands :coughvacuumingandlaundrycough: with my intense need to be on campus drafting (which I'll be doing after lunch today).

Growing up sucks.

Oh, plans.

So I PLANNED to be finished with my grant application last night so I could spend today on campus doing ship drawings.  Ha!  These essays are killing me - I need them to kick some ass!

So I could conceivably sit on the couch all day in yoga pants trying to describe my career goals and what it means to be me to be a new American in a thousand words or less.

Yay, grad school.

Sneeze

Got up at 7:30 am.  At work by 9:15 am.  Working by 9:30 am.  Stayed til 6:30 pm.  Studied all evening.  Listened to every single lecture this test is on.  Going to bed soon.  Up at 7 am.  Bruker lectures from 9 am to 5 pm.  Midterm at 12:45 pm.

Yes, there is a conflict.

The more I study, the less I feel like I know anything.  I have made four study guides ranging from 8-50 pages each and I still "know" nothing!!!

I'm praying for a passing grade.  That's how ill-prepared I feel.  It's so lame that the others get to cram all morning and I'm stuck in Bruker lectures...why couldn't they come last week or next week???  Epic bad timing.

Not even going to bother making cocoa.  Thinking I'll play more lectures while I'm going to sleep.  I need some of this stuff to stick!!

Ridiculous

I've been so busy!  I don't know which way is up anymore.  At least I have my car back now, it's making life INEXPRESSIBLY better.

I got up early today (yay Daylight Savings being over!  HA!) and went out to buy a microwave.

I now officially have ZERO counter space.  First world problems, I know, but when you're making bread or trying to cook a decent meal, no counter space and a minifridge are seriously limiting factors!

Today I also bought myself a cookie sheet ($4.50), a 3 qt saucepan ($14.00) and a candy/oil thermometer ($4.70).  I want to make my grandfather's fudge recipe for my classmates (and my professor...lol) but I realized I don't have it so I'll have to call my mom.  I heroically resisted buying the cookie cutters ($3.00) and cooling rack ($8.00) that I also desperately wanted.  I'm trying to save a LITTLE bit of money after all.  But I really need a second income.  How I'm going to get it I just don't know (pretty sure Youngest isn't going to be accepted by this third agent so it's time to start looking for agent #4), but I'm going to keep trying.

It's not even all the little things I "want" - candles and jewelry and books and pints of ice cream and flowers - or the big things I want - a Smith & Wesson .22 classic revolver (yes, I am imbibing Texas!), a new Nikon point-n-shoot (mine is broken AGAIN, I'm very cross), a Nikon DSLR - or even the ability to buy nice wine and Chinese takeout and the occasional t-bone steak when I feel the fancy to.  It's having the freedom to let things happen ("Murphy's Law" variety incidents) and being able to afford them without everything crashing down around my ears.

Anyway.  I have to get back to studying for my midterm.  And working on the presentation for Wednesday.  And to the grant that's due Friday.

Grad School Problems

Well, I can't believe it, but I have a teeny bit of a break tonight.  I've gone in early every day this month except this past Wednesday (had to take my car to Allstate) and this past Friday (had to wait for my bed to be delivered), and stayed late literally every day.  Gone in every Saturday this semester except one, and I went in this Sunday too.

Last night I stayed up til 2 am to get my presentation and worksheet done, and went in to campus before 10 am.  Skived off work (will do that on Saturday...sigh) and got all my drafting done around 6 pm.  Came home, my pirate costume was here and it's SO SHORT...going to have to buy stockings to wear under it.  Suffice it to say, if I turned around too fast in that thing, everyone would see my "booty"!!

Also, my ride to the party fell through.  So either someone rescues me, or I'm sitting at home Friday night :(  I hate not having my car!!!  In good news though, Allstate is fixing it (it's fixable!!) and I should get it back the end of next week.  I really, really want to go to this party, dammit.

Tomorrow is my long day, and once it's over I'm going to the library to do some reading on the VOC for my term projects.  Then I'll come home and do more reading.

I'm going to do some reading in a bit, but right now I'm luxuriating in the fact my work is FINISHED.  Need to double-check my presentation too.

I need to call home.  It's too late now, but soon.  Hoping I can take a chunk of this Sunday off so I can sleep in and laze around a little.

Car Flooded

So I wake up Sunday morning, go out to my car to check something, and it's FLOODED.

I don't know if you can see it here, but there's a line of trash on each side showing the water line was above the tires.

You can see how much water was in my trunk.  Thank GOODNESS this part has plugs and was relatively easy to drain!

The water didn't get the seats exactly, but there was so much underneath them (I don't know if you can see the 2 inches of water in the bottom there) that it wicked upwards and they're all damp.

I managed to get to SCUBA and get certified (thank goodness that's done!), get home, and the guy who drove me helped me siphon the water out.  Science never ceases to amaze me.  Put a tube in the cab of the car, and put the other end lower and all the water neatly suctions itself out!!  We also used the jack and jacked the car up on each side to help drain the water out.

We got most of the water out, but then it filled up about half an inch again and we realized the padding beneath the fabric is full of water.

I called the insurance company and they had to make it a party line and add Dad in before they'd file a claim.  I need to sell a book or win the lotto and buy the car in my own name and buy my own damn insurance.  This is SUCH a pain.  (Not that I am in any way shape or form upset that Dad is helping me out.  Without insurance I'd be up a creek alright!)

About to go down and check the padding.  Wondering if there's anything I can coat my car in to inhibit the growth of algae and mold.  Salt?  Would that damage the fabric?

What kills me is that I (and my cars) have been through hurricanes, earthquakes, heavy winds, mountain passes and goodness knows what else and came through unscathed...and ONE thunderstorm in Texas did this.

Seriously, I'm starting to think I'll look out the window and see Sharknado coming.  It's just that ridiculous.

Update: Went and checked on my car.  More pics:

 There was dirt in the cupholders so the water got at least high enough to spill over into it.  I put some soap on the wettest parts in the faint hope it might inhibit some growth.  Trying to find enough paper to soak up the leftover water as my ride took his tubing back with him.  I might have to sacrifice my Victoria's Secret catalogues.

Still, I'm trying to not bitch too much.  Turns out the downstairs apartments got flooded and today there's an army of people ripping out their carpets and trying to repair the flood damage.  I sleep on the floor...can you imagine what I'd be dealing with if I lived on the ground floor?

Small mercies...

Running to Class

I miss talking to my family.  I miss having downtime.  I'm exhausted.

SCUBA thoughts

Well, I've done three "dives" now and it is getting slightly easier (only slightly) and I'm still worried about being able to excavate in that condition.  I think having properly fitting gear will mitigate my worst problems - today I had to wear a size large vest because there were no medium ones left and I had the worst time trying to get buoyant - it kept pushing me forward and down and I struggled constantly, worse than I did a couple days ago when I accidentally put on an extra-large and nearly drowned because I was going ballistic all over that pool because my tank kept going every which way and I can't propel myself well with my fins yet. 

And I weighted myself incorrectly yesterday but didn't find out because I only used up 600 psi of air, so today I couldn't sink for the second half until one of the TAs came up and gave me extra weight and told me to add 3 pounds next dive.  My weight belt was 10 lbs today, so I'll make it 13 pounds next time and pray it works. 

Not being able to sink was SO FRUSTRATING I nearly cried.  It didn't help that my first mask snapped when I put it on, and putting masks on BLOWS anyway because they get stuck and tangled in my hair and it hurts and is the world's biggest pain in the ass.  I'm seriously considering buying a wet suit hood first thing of all so I can put them on, and then my mask will fit nicely and not get tangled.  Of course, I can't REALLY do that because hoods make you overheat in temperate water, but it's nice to pretend.  I asked the girl TAs and they suggested I braid my hair.  So, that's going to take some practice since my hair is much shorter now and I was never good at braiding my own hair even when it was down to my butt.

Speaking of my butt, it's still pretty mad at me about all this biking.  I'm equally mad at it for not getting used to this already.  Nothing like settling on your bike after 13 hours on campus and wincing because your tailbones are bruised. 

Speaking of 13 hour days, I'm SICK of them.  I have to pull two nine-hour days tomorrow and Saturday to make up all the hours I didn't spend at my job this week due to SCUBA, the midterm, and a presentation.  Oh, and the mapping project we're working on.  I'm so tired.  Sunday is going to be my only day of rest for two weeks straight (next weekend is a two-day dive for our final certification), and I'm going to have to do my accounts so I know how much money I have to spend on all the things I want/need - pots, pans, curtains, drawers, etc - and I hate doing my accounts.  But I have to.  This growing up thing is damn frustrating.

SCUBA diving is even harder than I thought it would be.  Your sight is so limited, and changes constantly when you turn your head.  Remembering to breathe - and through my mouth instead of my nose - is tough, and breathing even hurts my chest sometimes.  But you absolutely CAN'T hold your breath underwater ever or you risk lung overexpansion, which is asking for a seriously bad injury...or death.

Today, in the deep pool, I tried to swim back and forth in a straight line at different levels (because you need to practice being buoyant) and I did an okay job - partially because there are straight lines tiled at the bottom of the pool and I could at least keep straight.  I also tried to practice streamlining myself and to use my fins slowly and the way the instructors were instead of "bicycling" which they say newbies do a lot. 

We have a lot of things to practice underwater - partially flooding our mask and clearing it out, fully flooding our mask and clearing it out, taking our mask off entirely, putting it on and clearing it out; taking out our regulators and exhaling constantly until we put it back in, "losing" our regulator, finding it (exhaling continuously to avoid lung damage), and getting it back, "losing" our regulator and going for our backup regulator, then locating our regulator, switching them back, and reattaching our backup to our BCD.  Oh, and we have to stay with our dive buddy, check their air gauge regularly (as often as we check our own, because we need to surface while we still have 500 psi in our tanks, because a) you never want to fully exhaust your tank and b) you want extra air in case your partner's tank fails and you need time/air to reach the surface) and communicate with all these signals that I'm having a little trouble remembering.  Although the "I'm ok" sign is easy, and I've started giggling because whenever the INA people pass each other in the halls and you say, "What's up" or "How are you", all the experienced divers will say, "I'm okay" and give the diving "okay" signal at the same time.  Talk about a community within a community!

Diving is damned expensive though.  I've been asking around and people spend between $1,000 and $3,500 on their kits.  I'm going to have to sell several stories to get a kit!  Fortunately on a lot of "digs" gear is provided so I should be able to go slowly and purchase good pieces that will last.  Also, I don't think I'll bother with a tank.  They require so much upkeep, more than regulators even.  And they're much more dangerous to have around a house.  I was going to ask my parents for a dive watch for my birthday (ghastly expensive) but I was informed all round it would be better to save up and buy a dive computer instead.

It feels so weird, being so deep, with all that water around you, especially when you can't judge distance at all well, and breathing into a regulator (although I'm beginning to get the hang of it) and feeling a gigantic tank on your back and just feeling huge and clumsy and slow.  I wonder if whales feel that way?

I feel bad - I haven't talked to my parents in days, or anyone that I'm not in class with.  I'm exhausted, sore all over, I feel congested from all this diving, headachey, and I'm only hungry when it's really inconvenient.  I have been trying to eat healthier and several small meals a day.  My cousin Jade just got a puppy and took two days off work to make sure he settles in with her.  How I would LOVE to have a cat here!  But I can't afford one, and I travel and work too much to have one.  

I'm going to lie here and watch Law and Order until I'm calm enough to sleep.

Sunday again

Woah...it's Sunday already???  Where do these days come from??

This past week was rough, but the next two weeks are going to be WAY rougher.  I have 9 hours of class, I usually spend 15-20 hours on homework/studying, 20 hours on my job, and Monday-Thursday next week and the week after I'm going to have scuba class 4 hours day as well.  And on Tuesday I have a midterm and Wednesday a half-hour presentation...oy.

I spent Friday in a whirlwind - went to campus early, scanned for six hours, went to the Society for Underwater Technology's inaugural meeting of the semester, then went home, changed, and went on a date.  Got home, crawled into bed and stayed there til noon the next day.

Went to campus around 2:30, stayed for several hours working on my presentation, and then since it was raining and lightening badly John gave me (and my bike) a ride home, and I spent the rest of the night watching football and writing fiction.

Today I was good and got up at 9:30, went grocery shopping, came home and roasted a chicken (it was on sale for 77 cents a pound so the whole chicken was $3.50) which will form a large portion of my meals for this upcoming week.  Realized I needed foil and batteries so I rushed out to Wal Mart and got them as well as a pack of 100 disposable forks, which should keep me going for 3 months at least.  I must remember to put the batteries in my bike lights (they've been turning off after about 60 seconds and Rachel recommended I try new batteries, and it was the only thing I could think of too) so I can bike home at 10:30 tomorrow night without getting killed or ticketed.

I'm baking bread right now.  I think beefaroni and canned peaches for lunch, yogurt and fruit packs for snack, and cheese sandwiches for "dinner" will keep me alive at school, and I have all that nice cold chicken for dinner when I get home late at night.  The bread smells incredible and I will have to exercise considerable restraint to not eat both loaves at once.

I was going to go to campus today to work on my presentation more, but the sky was so threatening and I felt so coughy I didn't, and of course it didn't rain, and I'm just praying it doesn't rain tomorrow morning when I go in early to work on my presentation or tomorrow evening when I'm biking home.  Been trying to cram facts from 611 in my brain for my Tuesday midterm.  I have all the lectures recorded on my phone and I'm going to try and put them on my MP3 player and listen to them while I'm scanning tomorrow.

Okay time to get back to work.  Man, I can't wait for Friday after next!!!

Ugh

Today has been a pain in the ass.  Literally even - my tailbones are NOT yet used to biking 3.2 miles a day and settling on my bike morning and afternoon is not quite comfortable.

Overslept this morning, got everything wrong trying to get ready, got to campus well over an hour after I intended to get there, barely got any studying done before eating and having class.  Class was fun at least, and then things took a turn for the worse again when I went to the library and first the microfilm scanners were so slow they pretty much didn't work.  I timed by my phone, it literally refused to refresh and show the film for over ten minutes.  So I switched to the only other working scanner computer, and that one was, if possible, even worse. I turned it off, turned it on, and then it wouldn't even let me log in. I went downstairs and asked for help from the library help desk, and the guy was nice, but ultimately not super helpful.  I called the computing help desk and they asked me to try a few things and said it was definitely the computer, and they'd put in a work order.  I went back to Dr. Hamilton's lab and he said to just keep on them and hope the scanners get fixed soon, and since there was nothing else to do, I went home.

I have a midterm on Tuesday (GAH) and a big presentation on Wednesday (double GAH) and I'm starting SCUBA lessons on Monday which are 4 hours a day on top of everything else (TRIPLE GAH), so this weekend is going to be a pain and cramjammed with work.

And I have these online training things to do, which I should do tonight, since I'm sure I won't have time later.  I just had a cucumber salad and my parsley is soaking for chickpea salad so I should rinse, pick and chop it so I can eat it.

Sneeze, sniffle, cough

I'm definitely getting sick.  Earache, headache, sweating and freezing alternately, mucous and coughing.  I picked a relatively good time to get sick (assuming it's a 3 day cold) since I turned in my first projects and the next one isn't due for a few weeks, and I only have class tomorrow and work tomorrow and Friday.  Of course I have a lot of research to do for my presentation next Wednesday but that's relatively easy on a sick person, as it involves lots of sitting still.

I'm exhausted.  Haven't been sleeping well (finding it hard to sleep at night and sooo tempting to stay asleep in the morning) and I was damned lucky today because my alarms didn't go off and I woke up anyway, even if it was later than I was intended.

Class was tough today, and my presentation was ok, although it was embarrassing how much trouble I had with the French translations, when Mara didn't seem to have nearly as much of a problem.  For instance there was one word that would ONLY translate as root, no matter which of the sentences I typed in, no matter what I clicked on trying to find options...so I was saying this, but that it clearly supported the mast, and Dr Pulak said, "oh yes, that's the mast step" so that was highly embarrassing.  Also, as I was walking up to the front he said this was one of his favorite shipwrecks and I involuntarily said, "Oh God" (I hope he didn't hear me) because my first presentation wasn't great because I tried SO hard to make it different from his hourlong lecture on the same ships so I wouldn't bore the pants off him and everyone else, and then this one I retranslated the articles like three times and still couldn't figure parts out, so I was afraid of letting him down again.  But he seemed to like it, and nodded and was quite pleased with the extra research I put into the rigging (that research was a blessing because it was in English!! I see now what a trial it is to be unilingual in this profession, and need to improve my German, reconstitute my Portuguese and see if I can acquire competence in any others in all that free time I have) so I'm hoping that will weigh in my favor.

At least there are now a couple of French words I don't think I could forget if I tried - carene (there's an accent on the first e) which means hull, coque which means hull (I tried to see if there was a difference between the two but couldn't find anything), virure which means strake, and barrot, which means beam.  I also had one hell of a time trying to translate surbarrot, so I did sur by itself and got a list of twelve words, so when I talked about them in my presentation saying it could mean "above" "across" "over" or other things so it was some kind of beam or framing anyway, and Dr Pulak kindly explained that here it meant overbeam and they were used to keep the ship's integrity since there was a huge hatch in which to place storage and the lack of beams there would weaken the ship too much for oceanic crossings.  (I swear that was not in the article, or if it was, Google Translate and I need to have a little talk.)

You can see why it's imperative for me to learn (re-learn...) other languages.

As further evidence that I am 100% insane and should probably be locked up, I decided to do my 616 final project (basically extensive line drawings and drafts of ships of our choice) on the VOC (Dutch East India Company) ships, and my 615 final paper on the reasons for the decline for the VOC in the late 18th century.  Of course, in one way it's very sensible to research both projects on "the same" subject, but I did just suffer through a project in French and now I'm doing a gigantic project in which some of my resources will quite likely be Dutch and just as difficult to translate.

I got home and had the last of my bread and bacon and onion spread for dinner, had a lovely nap, and then finished Sense and Sensibility (I have made a resolution to only read stuff I haven't read before during the week to help improve myself), which made me feel marginally better about my "love life" (or lack thereof).  Pride and Prejudice is next - it's a collection of Jane Austen's most popular works - so I think I'll switch to Frankenstein next because I don't know if I can stand another 6 hours reading of misunderstood intentions and thwarted love right away.

Still not tired, even though I had a cup of noodles to soothe my throat and chest, so I might just snuggle up and watch models get slaughtered on Law and Order SVU instead of going to bed right away.  I have decided to be utterly delinquent and EAT LUNCH AT HOME before going to campus for class and work instead of going in early to research.  The warning signs my body is giving me are just too much for me to overlook (I remember getting bronchitis 3 times in 2 1/2 years in California for ignoring my symptoms) and I'm going to try and lie still a little more, even if I do have to read while doing it.

Bike Diaries

It turns out I still remember how to ride a bike, but my center of gravity has changed since I was 15 and stopped biking due to a knee injury, so I wobble frequently, especially when I remove a hand from the handlebars to wave or otherwise signal at cars.  Also, it turns out my butt has completely forgotten how to ride a bike and it now hurts a lot.  I texted Mom and asked her to put in my cushy bike seat cushion from my old bike into the next box she sends me.

I did get to school much faster, even if it's uphill most of the way.  Getting home was lovely, being mostly downhill - except my butt, as stated above, was very unhappy.

Yesterday I made bread with the last of my flour.  I need to practice more, because I'm having a tough time shaping the dough correctly.  Must buy more flour next week.  So I managed time to get the bread out of the oven and cooling 20 minutes before the bacon-onion stuff was ready, so I grated the cheddar while stirring occasionally and settled down to one of the most satisfying home-cooked, from-scratch, family-recipe meals I've had a in a LONG time.

Then I got back to work.

Today I went in early, finished project 2, worked, came home, passed out, tried to do project 3 and realized I missed a very necessary measurement so I'm going in early tomorrow to do it.  So I've been translating French and it's all done (I hope) and now I just have to get my presentation together.  Boiling water for a cup of noodles now, so I can have something warm for my throat before I go to bed.  I figured out that the cup noodles (different brand but they can't be that different) at Sam's Club are a whole cent more expensive per cup than at HEB!  Haha!  I'll keep getting them at HEB, mostly because I have nowhere to store 24 cups of cup of noodles.  I'll probably get the Sam's Club one when I've bought that electric kettle and keep them all on my nice shelf at work.

Anyway my eyes are exhausted and I really should work on that project some more, so I'll end here.  What a week!

Somehow, it's Sunday

I don't know how.  I've worked my ass off this week.  Went in early four days (Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri) and stayed late four days (Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri) this week, and went in on Saturday.  Have to go in early tomorrow to finish drafting Project 2 (I stopped on Saturday when I finished everything I knew how to do, being unwilling to risk massive erasures of everything I painstakingly got right after literally HOURS of effort) and  learn how to calculate Project 3.  Going to work on my presentation today too, but after an appalling Vikings loss (see reaction here:Carla The Viking ) I'm more than unwilling to settle down to work just this minute.

I don't get paid til the first (I am praying nothing is wrong with my direct deposit form and it goes through on the 1st asap!), and I have literally had to call and ask for more money three times this week.  It's getting me down bigtime.  I did a new budget and I have about $200 each month that's not for anything else, which is good, but still not a lot.  So basically, if I want any fiscal security I need a fellowship, to publish a book, or both.  I'm guessing both is what it'll take.  If any literary agents are reading this, I've got two finished manuscripts and am working on literally a dozen more every moment of "free" time I have, so please, contact me!

I realized this morning my first midterm is on Halloween.  I have to start studying immediately, since for two weeks I'm going to be spending 16 hours a week (on top of everything I do already) in scuba class...oh, Graduate School Gods, I beg of you, smile upon me!

I've been trying so hard to circumvent circumstances and find a good, healthy way to eat without a real fridge or a working freezer, and I am not doing well.  Today I spent $19 at Sam's Club and $22 at HEB, which is good, and almost exactly what I'll be spending when I can buy my own groceries (I've budgeted $40 a week), but it's so damn difficult when I can't buy 18-22 chicken thighs in a packet at Sam's and keep them in the freezer and defrost them one or two at a time when I need them!  This week I got 5 pork uh...steaks?  They don't have bones.  Anyway, whatever they're called, my plan is to marinate them in barbecue and each evening to take one out of the baggie and broil it per the directions on the label, and eat it with a baked potato, a baked beet, or some chickpea salad.  Lunches are the worst - once I can buy an electric kettle and have cup noodles for lunch it will be SO much easier and cheaper - so I bought one of the GIGANTIC tins of pineapple and will bring a little sandwich box of pineapple to school each day, along with one of the tiny gala apples and a nutrigrain strawberry bar and a microcup of beefaroni.  When my long days come with scuba class, I don't know what I'll do, but right now I'm hazily thinking I'll bring a baggie with a cup of cereal and eat that right before class and try to stay alive until 10 pm when class ends and I can bike home.  BIKE!  Oh, what a glorious feeling!  My commute will shrink and life will be MUCH easier...from a travel perspective anyway.

I also got bacon and have a lot of onions from last week, and will first bake some bread, and then make my bacon-onion spread and I'm just praying I can make two, three meals out of that, because that with the five pork steak things will be a whole week's meals, and if I can use them and my two cans of chili to eat until I get paid and then go shopping at literally midnight (I hope HEB is open then...might have to go very early Wednesday morning) for the next week.  Unless I just go on Sunday and buy a $3 pack of bratwurst and live on that, pineapple, and the 5 lb bag of potatoes I have until Thursday...we'll see.

I'm in too bad a mood to make bread right now.  I've just started my second beer, and maybe once that's done I'll be able to get some cooking done.

I also looked up mini freezers and the cheapest one I could find was $150 from Amazon.  Not happening.

I do have six beautiful apples (not from the bag of mini galas I take to school) and I'm torn between eating them fresh and turning them into apples n' onions.  I've also been sneakily considering adding bacon to apples n' onions, which I think would just be the bomb dot com, but that'll have to wait until I'm paid and can splurge on occasion, in case it's a failure.  My most recent attempt at acorn squash was a failure (guess you can't substitute butter with olive oil in all occasions), so I'm going to mash a potato, add the acorn squash to it, and pepper heavily to make it edible.  No wasting food in this joint!

Today I looked long and hard at the turkey necks (four medium-big ones for $4-6), chicken hearts ($1.50 a packet), and chicken gizzards ($1.80 a pack) and have been thinking about soup.  If I can get carrots from Sam's (they're ungodly expensive at HEB) turkey neck or chicken part soup might be both affordable and delicious.  But I think I'd want a turkey thigh (which runs to $6) or a chicken thigh (which you can't really buy singly) as well, so that would be much less affordable.  They had some nice butternuts, and I'm thinking one day I'll have to buy a big one and make my slow-and-low cooked butternut soup and have that be my dinner for awhile.

Oh well.  Cooking dilemmas aside, at least I have loving, supportive parents.  I've heard some horror stories recently, which makes me very grateful for my family, even if we aren't billionaires and I can't swan through life with Manolos or Louboutins.

Best Mommy Ever Update

So, a few times before I have posted about how I have the best mom in the world.  Today I get a text from my mom that she put more $$ in my account so I can get a bike (having read my blog post about not getting a bike because of my surprise cable/internet bill).  So I go buy a bike (very involved process when your 4G does not work IN the store, and you have to go outside to call home to ask their opinion), and between it, the warranty, the U-lock, and the lights I bought (helmet and pump will have to wait), I spent so much I had to call and ask if they could put more $$ in so I can buy groceries tomorrow.  And they agreed without blinking an eyelash.  SO, best parental units ever.

I also made a budget today.  If I stick to it, I should be able to afford a bigscreen tv by February, depending on how much I spend at Christmas.  lol

Yes, it is a guy's bike.  No, I don't give a you-know-what.  The girls' bikes were either cruisers (with bad reviews), $180+, or kinda flimsy.  This is a solid bike that will be a pain in the ass to haul up the stairs every day, but will support me (I hope!!) as I ride to and from campus and the gym every day.  Oh, the gym!  I can't wait!

So Much for Planning

Last night Mom called to make sure I was okay since they hadn't heard from me in such a long time.  It was good to talk to her, and she gave me some $$ so I could buy a bike this weekend.  Today I got home from campus and there was a $90 cable/internet bill.  So much for the bike!

Today has been a long day.  Went in early, stayed late.  I managed to get one of my French articles translated, but I simply can't find the second one anywhere which is freaking me out bigtime...I did find an extra article (in English!!) so that's something.

Have to go in early again tomorrow. Will probably stay late too.  Freaking out pretty badly about Projects 2-3.  Project 1 I think I've gotten squared away correctly.  This Wednesday after all my Projects are turned in and my presentation presented I'm going to go home, and lie on the couch and do NOTHING harder than watching a movie or taking a nap.  I'm going to need it!

Work is going well.  Scanning went very smoothly today, although I was distracted by two noisy boys at the next computer (have I ever mentioned how much I HATE people using the computers with microfilm scanners when they're not scanning microfilm?!?!) who were talking all sorts of nonsense (loudly).  When I went up to the computers they were all full, so I asked politely if I could use one of them (each of them is marked to ask people to "give priority" to those who are using microfilm) and they just looked at me and said, "I don't know what you're talking about" and the girl at the third computer said, "I'll get up, I just started so it'll be easy for me to move" (heaven bless her!) so I sat down and started working.  I was almost done when another girl came up and asked if she could use a microfilm scanner and I said she could use mine if she didn't mind waiting for my scans to finish downloading (the computers are so slow it takes half an hour to load a gig of scans onto a flash drive) and the guy spoke up and asked what microfilm was.  Apparently he had no idea it existed and once she explained to him he thought "losers" did it in their basements!  I had such a hard time keeping my mouth shut. 

Two especially funny things from today: I found Henry Huggins and Hugh Murray both emigrated to Jamaica in 1888!  Henry Huggins, of course, is from Beverly Cleary's Henry and Ribsy books, and Hugh Murray is a character from  L. M. Montgomery's Emily of New Moon trilogy.  I took a picture of Hugh Murray's name for Mom, I think it'll give her a laugh.  I suppose when finding things like that cheers me up that's a good thing.  Life has been pretty stressful lately.  Going to be on campus all day tomorrow and probably a chunk of Saturday.  I'm just praying I get to stay home Sunday. 

Time to get back to my shipwreck.  I need to go to bed...after I do the dishes, brush my teeth, apply moisturizer to my cracking skin...how does anyone "do it all"??!!

Out of Shape

Mentally AND physically.

I feel bad I haven't called my parents lately.  But I have so much work I just don't have time to talk and late afternoon early evening is when I focus best...maybe I can make time tomorrow.

Another long day today - up at 7:30, shower, eat, go to class.  Had my 9 am - 12 pm drafting class today, then I stayed later, had a quick lunch, and went to the library to do some scanning before my 2 pm - 5 pm class and gave my first presentation.  I felt shaky and stupid and awful, but I think (on sober reflection) that I did ok.  It was REALLY hard making the presentation interesting when the prof had literally gone over EVERYTHING before. 
Then I did some more  drafting, and got it wrong so I erased the wrong part and came home.  I walked in the door, dumped my stuff on the couch, and turned on the oven to start baking the potato.  Of course once it was in the oven I managed to change and unpack my backpack and do some work - mostly downloading scans and things.  Ate dinner, and got some work done, and then remembered I'm 17 days behind in updating and backdating all my stuff so I stopped to do that.  Just one file left now, but it's my photo file, it'll be about 40 minutes, if I'm lucky!

So I did my situp routine, and a 10 minute yoga routine (the old break in my wrist really doesn't enjoy my new yoga attempts, nor does my left knee...) and now I'm trying to decide whether to be a) good and work some more b) bad and work on my novels c) bad and try some calisthenics or d) bad and snooze on the couch until midnight.

Right now, I'm leaning towards B.  I'm going in early to draft some more tomorrow, and if I can stand it, I'll stay late too.  Same goes for Friday, although Friday is an opera get-together and Saturday night I have a date so that'll cut into some prime homework hours.  But I MUST have some mental relaxation/stimulation that isn't from work or school.  Or the next time you'll hear from me I'll be writing a blog called, "A Dozen Sherds Short of a Pot and in a Nice Padded Room for Repairs."

Tuesday Night

Well, Tuesday night is half-price (aka $2) pint night at Carney's, and guess where I'm not?  That's right, Carney's.

I was a very good girl today.  I dragged my butt out of bed, got to campus two hours early, started drafting Project Two (the scale is going to drive me to drinking if anything is GRRR), took a lunch break, went to class, then worked for well over four hours on finishing that reel I've been scanning for over a week now.  I must have spent at least 12-14 hours on that damn thing and there are about 20 more.  That agonized scream you heard?  It was my eyes.

Then I came home, made dinner, and worked on my presentation until 10.  Took a half hour break, and worked on it until 11, and loaded it on my flash drive and emailed it to myself.  Number #1 of grad school: BACK UP EVERYTHING.  BACK UP YOUR BACKUPS.  BACK UP YOUR BACKUP BACKUPS.  Trust no one, and most of all, no flash drive!

Now I'm "relaxing" and my dishes are done, my backpack packed (except for my netbook which is charging), my lunch is already packed and water bottle filled, and my entire outfit for tomorrow laid out.  All I have to do tomorrow is wake up, shower, and eat, and I can pretty much go straight out the door.

Being a good girl is such a load of crap.  What's a bigger load of crap is how crappy I'd feel if I hadn't worked my ass off all day and had gone out to Carney's.  Having a conscience...well let's just say it's inconvenient at times.

Time to lie on the couch and watch Friends to wind down before bed.

The First Semester is the Worst

(At least that's what all the third-years keep telling me.)

Dragged myself out of bed at 7:30 this morning after a highly disturbed night and managed to get to campus at 8:55 (it's a half-hour walk, and I had to shower first for anyone who thinks this constituted laziness), only to find out that the radiation certification didn't start until 10 am.  GAH.  Went into my office and tried to go through some of the Jamaica scans, even though I wanted to curl up under my desk and sleep right there on the unswept floor.

The training was fun and interesting, thank goodness, and the new Bruker we have is seriously awesome.  We can even order custom filters!!  My mind about exploded with the fascinating possibilities there...I do love science.  Training was done at about 12:30 and Dr. Hamilton took us out to lunch and I had a delicious chicken gyro...the hummus was a mistake, I should've gone with fries lol.  Got back around 2 and I did more Jamaica stuff until three when I went to the drafting lab and worked on Project 1 until SIX THIRTY which was when I finally finished.  I'm going to try and go in early tomorrow and get some input on it from Felipe and then start Project 2, since Projects 1-3 are due next Wednesday.  GAH!!  But Sam - one of Felipe's grad assistants - assures me the first semester is the worst and says I should really take Rigging 101 when I get a chance because you learn so much.  I'll consider it, but GAH for sure!

Tonight I've been trying to get some stuff for my Wednesday presentation done but I'm so sleepy I can barely sit upright.  Wondering if I should have a cup of noodles and then curl up in bed and see if I actually wake up at 7 and can get some work done then...no, I should really do the dishes and plod away at this presentation.  I would say I can't wait til Saturday, but I'm quite sure I'll have to spend a good chunk of it in the ship lab drafting, so...hooray whatever night I get a decent night's sleep!

Sunday "Funday"

Har har.  It's so much fun.  This weekend has kicked my ass.  Friday I got to campus early and did some reading/scanning in the NAP library, then worked for six hours scanning microfilm (and I STILL didn't finish the roll I've been working on), then went into the lab and drafted a ship that's due next week and it's so not good.  And there's a second project due next week too and I'm getting massive heebie jeebies because I'm having such a hard time grasping exactly what I need to do and how to do it.

I got home 7ish and had a short nap (believe me, it was necessary) before making dinner and being bad and reading fiction all evening.

Saturday I slept in (once again, highly necessary) then showered and went to campus and did some more frantic scanning and research for about two hours before heading home to watch the Aggies lose a heartbreaker in the last minute or two.  I tried to get more work done, but despite a nap I had a hard time pulling myself together and ended up getting a pint of ice cream for dinner and watching Poirots all night (I love you Amazon Prime.  So much.)

Today I got up early (well...9 am...which is early for a Sunday!), went grocery shopping, came home and watched the Vikings' game (another heartbreaking loss you can read about here: carlatheviking.blogspot.com) before getting back to work.  I did take a break to read a little of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (once again, thank you Amazon Prime and your lending library...I wish I could get more than one book every two weeks though), and that eased my pain a little.  Then I did my laundry and ate dinner and now I'm taking a little break before getting back to that ghastly presentation.  Why am I in grad school?  I sympathize thoroughly with Phil Gordon who said, "For a time I wished I'd stayed home and gotten married!"

I don't know how I'm ever going to talk for thirty minutes about Khufu's Barge and the Lisht timbers (well, I can, there's a boatload [see what I did there??] of information about them) and sound interesting and well-educated at the same time.  At least I get a powerpoint, it'll help me over the worst of it...I hope.

All this is not helped by whatever sickness it is I've contracted.  Faint, underlying headaches, a sore chest full of phlegm, a cough, a stuffy nose (worst in the morning), and sore ears are NOT making my life easier.  I've had four of those cup o noodles so far this weekend in an attempt to soothe my sore throat and I've even put my bread in a tupperware (French toast is all I'll be able to do with it now) so that I'm not tempted to eat it and make things worse.

If it weren't so hot in my apartment and bananas didn't ripen so quickly I would've gotten more than 4, but they do ripen so quickly and I have to eat them so fast to avoid the nasty brown spots it's foolish to get more than four even if they are nice and easy on my throat.  The minifridge situation is getting more acute.  Every week I'm stretched to the limits of my budget to buy enough food for the week (getting stuff to eat on campus is just making it tougher too) and I never get to buy those little things I need - oregano, thyme, basil, extra olive oil, soy sauce, etc etc.  Anyone feel like sharing the winning lotto numbers with me?  I'd love to pay all my debts, repay my parents, and move to a decent apartment without suffering from the $340 fee to break my lease.  I mean, if you have $4,000,000, $340 isn't going to bother you much, is it?

Oh well, enough stalling.  Maybe I'll magically finish this sucker in half an hour so I can go to bed with a book and still get up at 7:30 and get to campus in time for the Bruker lectures...and maybe they'll finish early and I can get some drafting in with Felipe to help me - or even Nathan or Mara because they really seem to be getting the gist of of it.  Lucky them!

Cockroaches

I hate them.  I really, really hate those ghastly scuttling suckers.  Today I'm sitting at my kitchen table, typing away and minding my own business when a half-grown one scuttles down my wall...I managed to hit it with my rolled up yoga mat so it fell to the floor.  After some yelling and thwacking with the yoga mat I killed it, got about seven sheets of kitchen paper and got it into the trash.  Then I sat to think about how the heck it could've gotten into my apartment since my door seems to be pretty tight.  I realized that since I've been opening my window to air out the cooking smell, that's probably how it got in.  So now I'm just going to open my bedroom window because it has a screen in it and keep my fan on to keep my apartment smelling nice.

But I've seen quite a few in the streets, and it's kinda creepy.  I remember seeing the Floridian ones in the garden a lot, but in the street?  These ones are much darker too, almost evil looking.  I really, really hate cockroaches.

I made bread!!

 

I made bread all by myself today!  I've never done it alone before so I was pretty nervous about it.

 

But it not only CUTS just fine - 

- it also tastes good too!  I think next time I need to add a little more salt...but that's ok.  I'm pretty proud I produced good bread on my first solo attempt!!

Made it to Texas!

Well, I'm here in Texas and mostly settled in.  There are a few (huge, glaring) problems, notably a broken air conditioner (I dare you to look up the average temperature in College Station right now.  I dare you!!) and the shocking revelation that when I called and specifically asked if this unit came with a fridge the answer was merely, "Yes", with no mention of the fact that it is indeed a MINIfridge.  Also, the pool is bright green.  So much for the crystalline pools advertised by the complex's website.  And, on top of all that, the toilet is highly temperamental and I've had to reach into the tank a half-dozen times at least to adjust the seal.  Grrr...I suppose I should be grateful that I know what to do...but I'm not feeling super generous right now, while I sit here in shorts and a tank and still sweating like a pig!

Here are some pictures from the trip and my new place:

The name made me giggle!

Fueling up!  We did a lot of this...

 Outside some coffee shop in New Orleans.  I kept thinking of that Scooby Doo on Zombie Island movie, and wishing I had it on DVD!

I was trying to capture how spooky the moon and the abandoned house were.

Sadly, even moving away from the pillars didn't really illustrate it the way I wanted.

 The guy hugging the dog kept trying to buy it from it's owner (the sitting guy).  Sitting Guy was unimpressed.

 No idea who this guy is.  Just liked the random shot!

 My new place!  I did not take a single before picture because it was just TOO DEPRESSING.  Anyway, that couch pulls out into a bed and will be my bed for a month or two until I can afford to get one from Macy's or somewhere.

How I'm going to cook a Thanksgiving meal in this pathetic excuse for a kitchenette, I just don't know.

 I mean, if it weren't for the table and shelving that I added, I'd have NO space at all!  To store or do anything!

I'm going to eat there too.  In case you can't tell, on the middle of the table is a vase my little sister got me, filled with the origami cranes she can make half-asleep and with her eyes closed.

  

This is my awesome green desk and my awesome green chair.  WOO!

 The bathroom is much worse than it looks.  I'm going to have to scrub like hell and figure out some genius way to tart the place up.

Where I'm sleeping right now, and where my bed will eventually go.


That's all for now!

Oh, Monday

Well, I had all sorts of lovely plans for today and they all flopped, mostly because I flopped.

Went to Leu Gardens this morning, and slipped and fell on a wet path.  Felt my knee twist and was on the ground and in pain for at least 5 minutes. Took me a good 10 minutes before I made it to a bench, and a dozen people walked by without offering help even though I was bleeding down my leg and had dirt and leaves all over my khaki capris. Managed to get to another bench where I finally got some help from some gardeners who saw me. They got a golf cart for me and got me back to the main place and cleaned me up a little with a first aid kit. Getting to my car was awful, and the drive nerve-wracking. Finally got home and managed to change into shorts, collect my crutches, and get to the bathroom to wash my knee.

Called my sister, who brought my mother and some Chinese food home for me.  Then she took me to the doc (hooray for the CentraCare app where you can make no-wait appointments!!!) who checked me out.
Holy moly having the doc manually test my ligaments HURT! I thought I was pretty good with pain but that was awful. Testing my ACL was worst.  I had to lie down, put my foot down on the table, and hold my thigh firmly while he pulled and pushed my calf.  I was so sore, I'm amazed I only groaned and didn't scream.  Then I had x-rays and the doc said everything looked great (thank GOODNESS) but he'd give me a cd with copies of my x-rays on it in case I decided to go to my old knee surgeon for a further checkup.  I only will if my knee doesn't get better in a week or so. 

Came home and spent the rest of the evening on the couch - you try eating your dinner while balancing a plate on cushions - and now I'm in bed where I will probably remain all day tomorrow.  At least I can make phone calls and and handle some of the moving business in bed, and even work on my thesis.  I have a lot to be grateful for...but I am feeling pretty sore and grumpy right now.  I would love it if someone magically appeared with a cheeseburger.  That's all for now, folks.

It's the end of July?

Where has the summer gone?  How are we now in the dog days?!  I'm sick yet AGAIN (seriously, if I were in a Victorian novel I'd be lying on a couch, feebly listening to a chatterbox nurse and attempting to ply a needle in some delicate embroidery), but the doctor says if I take the antibiotics she gave me and some mucinex and cough drops, then my ear infection will clear up, and the upper respiratory infection should go away instead of developing into bronchitis.  Let's face it, I bronchitis three times in 2 1/2 years in California, and I've been in and out of doctors' offices and hospitals my whole life...infections aren't something I can monkey around with.  Blah.  Healthy people are so lucky!

I think I'm also going to start taking Allegra again daily, just to see if allergies why I've been so exhausted all the time.  Last night I fell asleep at 9 pm (while reading), woke up at 10, got into my pjs and went to bed properly, and then I couldn't sleep until 4 am.  Woke up at a quarter to 8, slept again until 10 am, and then felt so rotten I just stayed in bed with a book until noon when I dragged myself into the dining room for some food.

I've been planning out the move to Texas, and happily the drive will only take two days (it's 15 1/2 hours, so I could even do it in one day if something happened that I needed to rush about it), so my sister will drive out with me and fly back after I'm settled in.  I guess we should book her flight, three weeks isn't any too long to make plans, hopefully we can get a good deal. 

Tomorrow (illness and weather permitting) I'm going to Wal Mart to get a day planner (sorry mistreated workers, but I'm broke and their stuff is cheapest), and then I'll call the College Station cable/internet and electricity people to arrange for my apartment to get set up.  Thank goodness I have a smartphone now so being without internet won't be so awful and LIMITING the way it was when I moved to Cali!  Once that's done, it's back to the thesis.  I keep praying one day I'll wake up and suddenly understand EXACTLY what I need to do, so that I can do it.  That'd be so great.

I should also sort out the stuff I want to take with me - never want to endure another road trip where my car is cram-jammed so high you can barely see out the windows!!  I'm leaving my easel, my paints, and my jewelry-making supplies behind which should make a huge difference.  My place is pretty much going to be monastic - Mom and Dad are getting me a bed, and I've decided to get a bunch of those IKEA end tables to use as a desk and table (yay sitting on the floor), but that's going to be it, other than a bookshelf or two, until I can afford to get stuff on my own.  I'm also going to leave behind all my nice wineglasses and martini glasses I got as presents, and I'll just buy a 6 pack of those IKEA glasses when I get there.  That should do me just fine.  Problem is, I'll have to bring quite a few textbooks with me...but Lidia is great at packing and without the paints, easels, canvasses, my guitar, boxes of jewelry supplies, etc, etc there should be a lot more room.

I'm going to miss painting :(

Enough for now, I need to get some reading done.  Oh the joys of graduate school!

Steroids suck

Been sick and in bed most of today.  Feeling better now so I'm going to read some morphology papers, but I'm overwhelmingly thankful there's just two more days of this crap.  I don't know how athletes do it, unless the steroids they take are completely different.

Hand's on

A few days ago I was in my garden, taking a breather from Phillips, Ford, and Griffin when something bit my right forefinger.  It looked like a normal mosquito bite, but it started spreading all over my finger, and my hand started getting red, so I called my mom, took a zyrtec, and went to lie down.  I woke up an hour later, and my hand looked like that (above) and I finally decided to go to the doctor.  Made an appointment with the CentraCare app (so useful), and got looked at.  The doc was convinced I broke it, but x-rays proved me right and I was loaded up with some prescriptions and told to begin taking them ASAP.

Turns out, steroids really suck.  They taste awful, they make you (me?) tired, and having to take them with antibiotics and zyrtec for 6 days is no joke.  Can't wait til I'm done, just 3 days left.  It also means I can't drink, and although I never really feel tempted during the week, not getting a glass of wine with Friday/Saturday dinner, and not having a beer while Dad is grilling, can be constituted as torture per the Geneva convention.  As if my forced sobriety due to the concussion this January wasn't bad enough for one year!

Anyway, as nasty as the steroids are, they're working and my hand looks almost normal.  My chest feels all pressed in though, so I thought I might be starting bronchitis (again, ugh), but you'd think the antibiotics I'm taking would fight it, wouldn't you?  I'm not sure.  My chest isn't any too happy, and I don't think it's allergies because I'm also taking zyrtec.  I hope whatever it is goes away.  If I get bronchitis or pneumonia yet again then my thesis will be even farther behind and it'll make my life even more miserable.  I told the doc at the clinic my chest was feeling tight and she listened to my breathing, but didn't say anything, so I guess they're clear for now anyway.

Today is Sunday, so I'm spending the day working on my Coursera art class.  Tomorrow I have errands to run, so there won't be much time for art on top of thesis work.  Still, what else are Sundays for?